This past weekend, I have watched a record number of disney classics. Including Sleeping Beauty, Hercules, 101 Dalmations, and The Emperors New Groove. I love disney movies. And I'm kind of upset with myself about how I've over analyzed them in this time. I was just thinking about things.
The difference between Disney movies from my childhood and the present day ones seems to be woman's independence. Gone are the days when it acceptable for a woman to be pursued by a man, to be rescued by him. I think that the values instilled in my childhood were formed, in part, due to Disney movies. I want to be rescued. I want to be pursued. I want to be saved by a handsome prince on a white horse. What's wrong with that? Does that make me unassertive? Do those desires make me old fashioned and a pushover by today's standards of what women should do and want for themselves?
I have dreams, yes. I will do almost anything to achieve those things. But one of those dreams is to be rescued by a knight in shining armor; to be swept off my feet and saved from peril danger by a man who loves me deeply.
The great news? I already have been.
I am saved. I've been rescued from extreme peril, the peril of my sin. And my knight will never disappoint me. I bet God is pro Old school Disney classics because of the desire it gives us girls to be saved. And there He is, ready to save.
I would like to say that this alleviates my desire to have a disney-esque romance but it doesn't. I still desire the earthly version.
but the Heavenly version is SO much better.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
So, all last week I was fasting. What for? Because I wanted answers. I have so many questions about my future...and my present. So I decided to fast in order that I might heart the Lord's voice more clearly.
Diet Coke is an addiction, to say the least. So I gave up all beverages other than water and all meat.
What did God tell me during this week of fasting? That i should drop out of college? That I am never going to be married? That I should major in something easy so I don't lose my scholarship and have to go to community college in Oklahoma?
No. He told me none of these things.
For a while, it felt like He wasn't telling me anything at all. Tuesday through Thursday were terrible days. Lack of caffeine combined with heightened frustration about EVERYTHING equaled an on edge, tense, mad at the world Kaitlyn. If possible, God's voice felt more silent than before. But still, I soldiered on. I wanted answers. Perhaps more than anything I had wanted in a while, I felt like I needed to know every step I was going to take these next few days/months/years.
Some of you will know where this is going...
It was only today, the day that I could finally break my fast, that God spoke to me.
His answer? Trust me.
Not a detailed description of how my life was going to play out. but trust. Trust that He had it under control. Which comforts me more than any physical, practical, step-by-step answer would have.
I am at the will of the most powerful being that has ever existed, exists now or will exist. He is sovereign, and He is good. And my future is at His mercy.
Scary? yes. Worth it? definitely.
"'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11
He is good.
Diet Coke is an addiction, to say the least. So I gave up all beverages other than water and all meat.
What did God tell me during this week of fasting? That i should drop out of college? That I am never going to be married? That I should major in something easy so I don't lose my scholarship and have to go to community college in Oklahoma?
No. He told me none of these things.
For a while, it felt like He wasn't telling me anything at all. Tuesday through Thursday were terrible days. Lack of caffeine combined with heightened frustration about EVERYTHING equaled an on edge, tense, mad at the world Kaitlyn. If possible, God's voice felt more silent than before. But still, I soldiered on. I wanted answers. Perhaps more than anything I had wanted in a while, I felt like I needed to know every step I was going to take these next few days/months/years.
Some of you will know where this is going...
It was only today, the day that I could finally break my fast, that God spoke to me.
His answer? Trust me.
Not a detailed description of how my life was going to play out. but trust. Trust that He had it under control. Which comforts me more than any physical, practical, step-by-step answer would have.
I am at the will of the most powerful being that has ever existed, exists now or will exist. He is sovereign, and He is good. And my future is at His mercy.
Scary? yes. Worth it? definitely.
"'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11
He is good.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
February 16, 2011
I'm supposed to be writing a five minute play right now. It's due tomorrow, so what better to do than procrastinate with a blog!
I have nothing wise to say, but do i ever? no. so no surprise there.
let me just tell you, blogworld, that life is hard. and while i may be laughing at my circumstances the fact of the matter is that i'm scared. I don't know what I want to do with my life. Much less what God wants me to do with my life. The two should not be separate entities which is where I think i'm stumbling. Which brings me to a whole new facet of my life.
I want to want what God wants for me. (not a typo) but not knowing what He wants makes it difficult to want that.
We'll use boys as an example, they're always problematic.
I have never had a boyfriend. For a long long time I was really upset with that fact, and I probably still am a little bit. But little by little God has been capturing my heart and my single-ness is not something that i revel in anymore. I know that God's plan is perfect. And so with my new found semi-contenedness in the situation I was ready to say no to boys all around. Enter: boy. I've known him since august and had the smallest of crushes on him since that time. But i knew that nothing would ever come of anything between us, it just wouldn't work out. Well, now things are starting to change with that. And I just don't know how to deal with it. Is what God really wants for me right now to have this guy in my life? If i'm not ready for a boy(friend?), and I don't necessarily believe that I am, why would this guy happen at this time? I simply cannot give up the part of me that longs for earthly affection. It's a downfall of mine, really, that I am not selfless enough to surrender this one desire.
that was the most emo, high school, girly, pointless blog in the world.
i'm sorry you read that.
Happy National Almond Day!
I have nothing wise to say, but do i ever? no. so no surprise there.
let me just tell you, blogworld, that life is hard. and while i may be laughing at my circumstances the fact of the matter is that i'm scared. I don't know what I want to do with my life. Much less what God wants me to do with my life. The two should not be separate entities which is where I think i'm stumbling. Which brings me to a whole new facet of my life.
I want to want what God wants for me. (not a typo) but not knowing what He wants makes it difficult to want that.
We'll use boys as an example, they're always problematic.
I have never had a boyfriend. For a long long time I was really upset with that fact, and I probably still am a little bit. But little by little God has been capturing my heart and my single-ness is not something that i revel in anymore. I know that God's plan is perfect. And so with my new found semi-contenedness in the situation I was ready to say no to boys all around. Enter: boy. I've known him since august and had the smallest of crushes on him since that time. But i knew that nothing would ever come of anything between us, it just wouldn't work out. Well, now things are starting to change with that. And I just don't know how to deal with it. Is what God really wants for me right now to have this guy in my life? If i'm not ready for a boy(friend?), and I don't necessarily believe that I am, why would this guy happen at this time? I simply cannot give up the part of me that longs for earthly affection. It's a downfall of mine, really, that I am not selfless enough to surrender this one desire.
that was the most emo, high school, girly, pointless blog in the world.
i'm sorry you read that.
Happy National Almond Day!
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
February 8, 2011
I'm just here to say that I have been so blessed.
The Lord has divinely appointed this lovely girl and I to be friends and it becomes more obvious every day.
I won't go into details but know that God sees the big picture and His hand is at work in each of our lives every day.
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